Getting to the Heart of Conflict

Today I am going to call upon one of my "mentors from afar", C.J. Mahaney, to share a few words about conflict from James 4. C.J. is a great pastor, author and speaker. But most of all he is a great lover of Jesus Christ and a humble servant of Christ's church. These words were taken from a message entitled "Cravings and Conflict". If you like these thoughts plead follow the links below for the "rest of the story".

"Do you tend to minimize your relational conflicts? Do you attribute them to something superficial, or entirely to someone else? Or do you seek to evaluate your conflicts from a divine perspective?

When, after years of denial, baseball player Pete Rose finally acknowledged betting on the game while manager of the Cincinnati Reds, his apology was as follows: "I'm sure that I'm supposed to act all sorry or sad or guilty now that I've accepted that I've done something wrong, but you see, I'm not built that way. So let's leave it like this. I'm sorry it happened. I'm sorry for all the people, fans, and family it hurt, let's move on."

Let's move on. All too often, this can be my approach to resolving relational conflict. There's a degree of sorrow, but it's superficial. And the accent of guilt is on the other individual. As for me, I just want to "move on."

But this passage confronts me: "There's no moving on yet, pal. Where do you think you're going? Come back here, please. Let's have no 'Pete Rose type' confessions among those who profess to love and serve Jesus Christ—but rather confessions that proceed from a genuine awareness of our sin against God."

James 4 can transform how we respond to relational conflict. A divine perspective will keep us from minimizing conflict, help us avoid vague, superficial confessions, and prevent us from prematurely moving on, leaving unresolved conflict in our wake. Through this passage we understand that to engage in quarrels and fights is to sin against a holy God. Conflict is more serious than we think.

The well wisher of your soul's happiness,

Pastor Tom

"Cravings and Conflict" – PDF - C.J. Mahaney

"Cravings and Conflict" – MP3 - C.J. Mahaney